It had been said by many a composer, artist, or entrepreneur, that often the biggest sense of empowerment comes with the ability to reject, to say no. That may be due to a newly found sense of independence which no longer requires subverting personal standards of excellence, by remaining true to what drives you in your art or act of creation, by keeping the vision pure… keep the principles of the self intact. Beware the man of principle, for he will sacrifice himself and all he has to maintain true to his passion.
Epic Personality, Principles & Intensity
People such as this have a personality that often views life in an epic or larger than life mental/emotional scale. They feel deeply, think profoundly, life as wholly as possible and endeavor to keep every facet and aspect of their lives active and alive and growing. Each interaction sought out is to be authentic & substantive, each engagement in creation holistic and of entire Being, each experience made the most of in the best they are able (depending on your personal bias). Others will either be attracted to this personality, or will feel threatened by it because of the level of intensity this personality often produces.
However, if it is another that is the recipient of this level of attention, their passion – be prepared, for such attention can both raise and dwarf the spirit.
On one hand, involvement with this type of personality can make you feel like you are the most important person in the world, because to them you ARE. Every effort will seem perhaps more involved, more complex, and larger than life – everything designed to feed and engage you. Even small elements have a measure of intention to creating a new experience, making one feel safe and welcome, engaging to your senses or challenging ideas. Its interaction in a cinematic sort of scale.
On the other hand, with such commitment of will and drive directed behind it, the experience can feel overwhelming to the recipient. It can be at times exhausting or dwarf you in its scale, it might make you feel insecure in being able to do something equally grandiose. It can sometimes make the other feel competitive, where once your knowledge or experience was at the top and yet this other makes it seem as if you’ve only scratched the surface. It can feel diminishing.
This latter feeling is the unintended consequence of the epic personality, and is actually exactly the opposite of what they are trying to create. All they want is the engagement, the connection, and to have the effort and thought which is being given acknowledged and appreciated. Usually the scale of the effort isn’t given much thought – its just the way they do things or show they care.
Exchange & Connection
To the Epic Personality, any return gesture to their gift of time and talent is joyous, but in no way needs to be the same level of intensity or magnitude. Its not measuring the efforts, but rather looking for the recipient to accept the gift with honor, by doing so graciously and returning the gesture in whatever way they can that is best suited for them. Its open giving without measuring to foster the Exchange. We each give, in the way we are best suited to give. That is the power of the Exchange – to forge and feed Connection.
To this personality, a gift received and taken without acknowledgment is strictly taking. Therefore there is no Exchange being developed (giving in two directions) but rather a one way flow. Worse still is how the act of giving can be misinterpreted by some as trying to make the other feel insecure, subversive or manipulative. They cannot match the giving, so suspect some ulterior motive or creates feelings of inadequacy. Such a reaction will be felt as a betrayal by the giver.. because it is a perversion, a warped distortion, of the intent and action.
If someone takes all the time and effort to find a gift just for you, wraps it perfectly, presents it to you with attention and thought – how do you respond? Do you acknowledge the effort and energy of the gift, and try to show appreciation? Do you just take it without word of thanks? Do you leave it behind? Do you see it as some hidden insult or accusation, insinuating you can never measure up?
Its a Gift.. one gift among what should be many in the ongoing dynamic of the Exchange between both parties.
However, like all efforts given, there at some point has to be the recognition or reward. A businessman will not keep at the same business if the attempts to grow it aren’t working, though they may stop and refocus on a new opportunity elsewhere. A painter or composer, if unable to get their work to take the shape they see or hear in their mind, will eventually put it down and move onto another project in hopes that a renewed effort and fruition may come at a later time. However, once such a person has given their all, one cannot underestimate the time needed to recover their energy, beliefs and vision. They have poured all of themselves into their effort, their pursuit or creation, and it is only when they are completely spent that one is able to finally “give up” and rest – for a time… and then move on because they can’t stop moving, even if they want to.
Given enough signals, many can walk away from something that proves too challenging, too exhausting. Yet for others it seems like just another lesson, another bump in the road, another instance of learning what you can and then trying something different with equal or greater conviction. There are those who seemingly just don’t know how to give up – yet may yearn to do so because without that ability, the ability to walk away, there is the tendency to stay and fight through any odds.
It is not from a sense of martyrdom, looking for a way to play up sacrifice for pity or poor luck; rather it is through a sense of pride, of duty, of personal ethos to do all they can. It is the act of creating something, something alive with an Exchange of energy and effort. They are therefore by no means quitters, and if anything that may be part of the problem.
A soul such as this does not take to signals and signs; hints and clues are often completely missed because they can remain focused on moving forward, driven by a need to succeed in whatever fashion is important to the individual. For this kind of person, subtle hints are just a message to rethink strategy, regroup, and try again with either different tactics, or greater effort, or with greater vigor. The drive, the belief in will and effort, the passion with which they act – these things do not allow just stopping and walking away from any effort.
They are stubborn, often cannot see the hints, the subtle is often missed, and it needs to be clear. As such, we apply ourselves until it is more than apparently clear that everything has been done that can be done. All options used, all energy spent.
So, to those that may know this type of personality, all I ask is that you honor them in the way you can – not by trying to “measure up”, but by honoring what is given in the way that you can. Whether by good discussion, quality time, an act of your own creation, what-have-you. It is the ability to receive graciously and reciprocation in your own way, not their way or their measure, that feeds the Exchange. Give in the way you can give, not necessarily the way you think they expect.
Even the smallest of drops, over time, form the oceans whose depths we still do not fully appreciate.
Copyright Limits Unleashed