Kinky Evening Ideas Cheap and Quick

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Do you need some quick and kinky ideas to spice up tonight?

Try these suggestions without having to run around in a panic or spend too much cash. Most of these ideas can be found at local discount chain retailers or big-box stores.

Just remember to be safe, think ahead, and plan accordingly (including worst case “what if” scenarios).

When in doubt, start slow with things you feel more comfortable with, and your confidence will grow with practice and exploration over time.

Setting & Senses

Setting matters – a lot, but it doesn’t have to be hard to do. The key to your building a kinky setting is to invite immersion through triggering the senses.  Remember your 5 primary senses?  That’s a good place to start.

Sight: While a clean place and flowers are nice, its not always going to create the steamy invitation that appeals to a sexy evening.  Instead, you need to indulge the eyes and draw them in with lighting and color.  For lighting, keep things dimly lit and create an arrangement of pillar candles (e.g. on a plate) in certain focus areas. Also place a few small ones around (votives, tealights) for ambient light. I typically recommend unscented or only lightly scented candles as they won’t aggravate most folks allergies.  Candles possess a living light and have a color which is soothing and warming –  typically associated with romantic overtones.

Color: Another aspect of sight is color, and lighting effects colors dramatically (as any photographer knows).  Because the above suggests dim lighting and living light, I have found that saturated colors such as jewel tones (sapphire, ruby, onyx, emerald, etc) are more engaging and is also emotionally attributed luxury, indulgence, richness.  Using fabrics or items of rich and saturated jewel tones often causes the eyes to open captures their focus.

Sound: Music makes a difference, but then again so does any type of sound.  Sound is one of our “early alert systems” and we want to use that to our advantage.  With darker lighting we also force the mind to focus on other senses to widen our awareness.  Set the stage with some sexy down-tempo music, then build up the tension with faster and edgier tunes.  Movie soundtracks are a great way to find tracks that can really make things… interesting.   Remember, you are appealing to their senses to engage, focus, and awaken their appetites.

Smell:  Incense is also very good better at suggesting a night of indulgence.  For something more personal, select their favorite cologne or perfume that they love to smell on you and dab some on a cotton ball or a bit of facial tissue and place in a small cup or glass around the place (but NOT near the candles). This is especially true of a scent that first remarked on liking, or having a memory of  (the smell of you on that weekend away, etc).  It reminds them of you specifically, not just any occasion or interlude.

Touch: Want to keep someone connected, listening with their whole body?  Don’t let go – maintain some element of touching with slow movement. This tells the body to “pay attention” and keeps the person locked in on a particular series of experiences – whether to draw them in or distract is up to you…

Taste: Taste and smell are inexorably linked, and a conflict between the two can put a person out of enjoying their experience.  Shower, clean up, drink plenty of water today so you don’t taste like garlic or burritos!  Remember to that if you are wearing perfume or cologne, that will leave a taste as well, so be careful to use sparingly.  Or, use some edible fun to engage taste more deliberately.  Sometimes a little bit of bourbon casked pure maple syrup can go a LONG way (or use chocolate, whipped cream, whatever floats your boat).

Expectation: How you dress (or undress), provides queues about what might be in store.  Or opt to use those expectations against them for some memorable kinky surprises.  You can lead their imagination to wish fulfillment and fantasy, or showing how raw and intense things can be despite the seemingly gentle or casual appearances.  Playing with expectation through change, pauses, and contrasts keeps the mind present and stops one from trying to predict what will happen next.

Toys & Implements

Pervertables are everyday items that can be used for kinky fun.  These are typically cheap ideas that are easily found at common chain stores such as Target, Walmart, CVS/Walgreens, PartyCity, Michaels, PetCo, and last but not least… HomeDepot (often refereed to as “DomDepot” for the things you can get there).  These are just suggestions, and are meant to get the creative ideas flowing.  With any of these, think safety first before improvising.

“Pervertables” are objects you can find creative uses for in BDSM
  • Wooden Clothes Pins – great for quick nipple & labia clamps; you can also use binder clips/clamps if you tape up the metal with duct tape first
  • Chain – quick collar and restraint, and aluminum is cheap and light weight; secure with a carabineer, snaphook, or luggage lock
  • Rope – when used carefully, provides DAYS of entertainment; luckily “single column ties” are very easy to learn
  • Cord – like the above, great for hair ties, but also fantastic for quick DIY floggers
  • Dowels – when cut to size and paired with nice eye hooks, closet dowel make great spreader bars; thinner dowels are good for improvised canes
  • Stretch Wrap – great for quick bondage, and tons of different sized tapes available in the moving/packing depts..
  • Dog Leash – use as a lead, or use in a set of four to secure your partner to bed legs or posts
  • Rubber Bands – nothing says ZING like a snapped rubber band; its that simple
  • Kitchen – cutting/cheese boards as paddles; and other tools such as wood/bamboo spoons, whisks, spatulas, for various sensations
  • Bath – hair brushes can be used as paddles and general sensation play, as can a variety of other things – Get creative!
  • Scarves – blindfolds, wrist ties, gags; the silk ones are nicest
  • Bandage Scissors – blunted at one end to prevent accidents, because cutting off clothing is hot..

Closing

Be as conservative and gentle, or as wild and exciting, as your imagination and mutual comfort allows. A few good practices are:

  • Remember that your partner may or may not be on the same page, so start with the setting and a plan for a range of options to go with, from mild to wild
  • Get consent! It doesn’t matter what your plan is if they aren’t OK with it.  Respect their choice, its criminal otherwise not to.
  • Agree on a simple safeword; I like the traffic light model: Red = Stop;  Yellow = Slow Down & Check in;  Green = All good & keep going!
  • Don’t overdo it! Use kink to spice things up and add a dimension to your love life, but remember it’s the quality & health of the Relationship that matters most.

 

-Sir Vice
Copyright 2017 Limits Unleashed

 

 

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